Half of people in a relationship have never considered couples therapy and never would, according to research.
A poll of 2,000 adults found this number rose even higher for some generations, as this option is firmly off the table for 75 per cent of Boomers.
Possibly because a quarter (26 per cent) of all respondents believed it’s only for relationships “on the brink” or “in crisis”.
Reflecting the belief held by 11 per cent that going to couples therapy would be the equivalent of admitting they shouldn’t be together.
Further to these negative perceptions, some are holding back on account of concerns about what would happen if they were to talk about professional help as an option.
As 15 per cent were worried about how their partner would react to the suggestion of couples therapy.
And 11 per cent even thought their relationship could benefit from external support, but they’ve been too nervous to bring it up.
Victoria Wren, BACP-accredited therapist from BetterHelp, which commissioned the research, said: “No relationship is perfect. Disagreements are a natural part of any partnership – what matters most is how you talk to each other when they happen.
“For many, reaching out for support feels uncomfortable or unfamiliar, but an objective, neutral space can make all the difference.
“It helps couples see past assumptions, break unhelpful patterns, and move forward together with more understanding.”
The research found only one in 10 couples have ever tried counselling, but the generation most open to it were revealed as Millennials (18 per cent).
But despite this, one in 10 adults aged 29 to 44 even declared they’d sooner break up than attend couples therapy.
The data also uncovered there is less stigma towards individual therapy compared to couples therapy, as respondents were over three times more likely to consider the former (32 per cent vs nine per cent).
The findings also highlighted fundamental communication issues in relationships; on a weekly basis 39 per cent admitted to saying “I’m fine” when they are not.
In the same time frame, 28 per cent will avoid raising issues with their partner to sidestep possible conflict.
While 31 per cent had a habit of checking their phone during conversations with their partner and 11 per cent admitted to keeping score of who's “right” or who “wins” arguments.
In response to these issues, couples are more likely to self-remedy their relationships through investing in spending time together – whether through holidays (41 per cent), regular date nights (24 per cent), or trying out new shared hobbies or activities (22 per cent).
And of those who have considered counselling but not yet tried it, many cited outdated beliefs – with 27 per cent preferring to handle problems on their own and 24 per cent feeling their issues aren’t “serious enough”.
Whereas 16 per cent fear judgement from others and 15 per cent even worry therapy could make things worse, according to the OnePoll.com data.
Encouragingly, despite these reservations, 39 per cent of this group said they would be more open to counselling if it were easier to access online.
And 35 per cent said the same if they could be matched with a therapist who fits both partners’ needs or if it felt “less serious” or more casual (27 per cent).
Victoria Wren added: “Couples therapy can be about prevention and stability – giving you tools to communicate better, to understand each other more deeply, and to stop resentment before it builds.
“With our unique matching algorithm, couples can choose from thousands of qualified therapists until they find the right fit for them.
“Asking for help isn’t a sign of failure, it’s a sign of investment in your relationship.”
